Why do you want to set this goal of FI?

118 | From Financial Infidelity to His & Her Money

My favorite part of this episode was the sincere and genuine advice to play to your strengths and really figure out why FI is a goal. I also loved his advice about how to talk to others about FI by keeping in mind that you are in the minority and they may not listen and what you can do is to say what you are doing and let the results speak for themselves.

For so long, I felt intimidated by personal finance. It can feel intimidating to the point where you just throw up your hands. (17:29)

Book recommendation: The Two-Income Trap.

We were NOT going to be waiting no 30 years, not even no 15 years, to be paying off our home. If you waited it out, you’d still be paying for that house twice over. We decided we would never make a minimum payment on our mortgage from day one. (22:14)

Since you know money well, you do this for a living, why don’t you handle our finances and you just let me know what I can spend and what I can’t spent. The problem that was that she was doing all the work and I wasn’t involved at all, and what happened was we were both beginning to build resentment but neither one of us was voicing it. (31:16)

Don’t try to make your spouse into you because that would be boring if there were two of you. It’s important that you both identify what you are good at and do that. (34:37)

It’s important for you to identify why. Why do you want to set this goal of financial independence? Why? You can’t just look at the what. Why is it important? Take time to dream together. What do you want your life to look like 5 years from now? (35:49)

We talk, yes. Do they listen? Barely. We’ve learned to be okay with that. Especially when you’re first experiencing change that’s so beneficial to you, you want to tell the world because you want them to have that too. When they don’t have that enthusiasm, it can be such a downer. We understand that no everybody will get it. Does it stop us from trying to be a help? No, we still try to help. We have a firm understanding that it might not stick. We really hope it does but we understand that it might not. We’ve learned to let our life speak louder than our words. (40:00)

When we were in the midst and the throes of this thing, people had jokes and would question us and our decisions. When it happened, they asked “how did you do that? Tell us how to do it.” You just have to live what you’re saying and still encourage people. Understand that you are in the minority. Give people grace to have their own journeys. (40:56)

Our world isn’t setup for the FI community, it’s setup for consumerism. You scroll on your phone, you’re going to get ads. You turn on the TV, you’re going to get ads. You go on the desktop, you’re going to get ads. Because ads work. (41:18)

Recommended reading: Stock series by J.L. Collins.

FI Is Just A Few Steps Away

024 | FI180 | Make a U-Turn and Choose FI

Joel & Alexis tell their story of going from a 7% savings rate to 85% then back down to 75%. A car accident motivated a wake-up that led to five-year path to FI which is pretty inspiring. I particularly love this interview because of the two different takes on the same future at the end (56:18), because I identify with a past life filled with unintentional spending (I’ve changed!), and because it inspires me to save more than spend and to spend on what I care about most.

They’re on a five-year path to FI just by making a few changes. FI is just a few steps away. (2:17)

One of the things that strikes me is how willing people are to commute hours to work and they don’t consider the cost. One of the most valuable things you have is time. (5:04)

We made it a game. Each month, we came up with one thing that we can do on our budget to reduce our spending. (6:29)

Holy cow, you don’t have to work for 60 years. The job I have now is as good as it can get in software engineering; I have a lot of autonomy, I work with great people, I have great benefits. It’s just not where I want to be. It’s not what I want to do. When the alarm goes off, I don’t want to get up. I want to be in control of my schedule and doing things that matter to me and not helping the bottom line of a big company. (11:19)

Happiness increased after spending less. (15:59)

We didn’t know how to cook well, so we were going out to eat twice a day. We needed to learn not only how to cook but to cook things we would enjoy. Going out to eat did not make us happy. Now we cook meals that we enjoy for pennies on the dollar and they’re healthier too. (17:30)

$100,000 in discretionary spending… how does that happen?! It’s about not paying attention… (19:34)

What are you running to? Take a step back and figure out what your dreams your passions and your goals actually are. Explore. Don’t graze. Be intentional. (47:44)

The story at the end paints a picture of two different futures—56:18—it’s superb and worth a listen.