Why do you want to set this goal of FI?

118 | From Financial Infidelity to His & Her Money

My favorite part of this episode was the sincere and genuine advice to play to your strengths and really figure out why FI is a goal. I also loved his advice about how to talk to others about FI by keeping in mind that you are in the minority and they may not listen and what you can do is to say what you are doing and let the results speak for themselves.

For so long, I felt intimidated by personal finance. It can feel intimidating to the point where you just throw up your hands. (17:29)

Book recommendation: The Two-Income Trap.

We were NOT going to be waiting no 30 years, not even no 15 years, to be paying off our home. If you waited it out, you’d still be paying for that house twice over. We decided we would never make a minimum payment on our mortgage from day one. (22:14)

Since you know money well, you do this for a living, why don’t you handle our finances and you just let me know what I can spend and what I can’t spent. The problem that was that she was doing all the work and I wasn’t involved at all, and what happened was we were both beginning to build resentment but neither one of us was voicing it. (31:16)

Don’t try to make your spouse into you because that would be boring if there were two of you. It’s important that you both identify what you are good at and do that. (34:37)

It’s important for you to identify why. Why do you want to set this goal of financial independence? Why? You can’t just look at the what. Why is it important? Take time to dream together. What do you want your life to look like 5 years from now? (35:49)

We talk, yes. Do they listen? Barely. We’ve learned to be okay with that. Especially when you’re first experiencing change that’s so beneficial to you, you want to tell the world because you want them to have that too. When they don’t have that enthusiasm, it can be such a downer. We understand that no everybody will get it. Does it stop us from trying to be a help? No, we still try to help. We have a firm understanding that it might not stick. We really hope it does but we understand that it might not. We’ve learned to let our life speak louder than our words. (40:00)

When we were in the midst and the throes of this thing, people had jokes and would question us and our decisions. When it happened, they asked “how did you do that? Tell us how to do it.” You just have to live what you’re saying and still encourage people. Understand that you are in the minority. Give people grace to have their own journeys. (40:56)

Our world isn’t setup for the FI community, it’s setup for consumerism. You scroll on your phone, you’re going to get ads. You turn on the TV, you’re going to get ads. You go on the desktop, you’re going to get ads. Because ads work. (41:18)

Recommended reading: Stock series by J.L. Collins.

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